Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
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