help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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