she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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