i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
