hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
