he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
