I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize