his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
