He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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