pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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