I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
he fucked my hip out of place.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
