i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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