help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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