Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
