you're like a bully in the Christmas story
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
