big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I smell like Dick and happiness
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