So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize