My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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