I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
And then my night got REAL pukey
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize