i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
