Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
