of course. lets lasso hookers.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
