Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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