...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
