I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Gay?
German.
Pity.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
