i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
nutella sex= disaster
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
this is an emotional support booty call
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
