we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
