You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
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