it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
