How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
