The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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