My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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