doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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