so let's talk penis.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
