But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize