Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Randomize
