You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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