Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Everything about him screamed your future.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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