508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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