K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
