He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
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