I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize