I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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