Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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