Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
