i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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