Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
