Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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