I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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