Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
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