Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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